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Scott Cresswell

POST 62 --- DOOM PATROL: PLANET LOVE

Well, here we are, the end. Morrison’s long stint on Doom Patrol (vol 2) certainly made some changes to the team and characters, yet its climax was far more devasting than expected. From Doom Patrol (vol 2) 55-57 (read my review of it here), Morrison went wild. Joshua was murdered by the Chief, who intentionally created the Doom Patrol and their strange heroes. However, once he claims his desire is for world domination, the Chief’s head is ripped off by his prototype android, who reveals himself to be the Candlemaker, a deadly entity dreamed up by Dorothy and her imagination. With both Jane and Rebis absent and Robotman’s brain torn into pieces, what’s next. How can the heroes defeat their nemesis? And more importantly, will the Doom Patrol recover after the Chief’s actions?


In the last of six reviews covering Grant Morrison’s run on Doom Patrol (vol 2), I will be reviewing:

In the Wonderful Land of Clockwork/Dying Inside/Brief Candle/…/Planet Love --- Doom Patrol (vol 2) 58-62

The Empire of Chairs --- Doom Patrol (vol 2) 63

Judgement Day --- Doom Force Special


Doom Patrol (vol 2) 58-63 were published from August 1992 to January 1993. These issues are the last to be written by Grant Morrison, with art usually by Richard Case and Stan Woch. Doom Force Special was published in July 1992, written by Morrison with art by a number of different creators. Lastly, I have read these stories in their

Doom Patrol: Planet Love tpb, featuring another great cover by Brian Bolland.

original issues, but locating them in collected form shouldn’t be a challenge.


In the Wonderful Land of Clockwork/Dying Inside/Brief Candle/…/Planet Love --- Written by Grant Morrison with art by Sean Phillips, Richard Case and Stan Woch


THE STORY

After losing his brain, Cliff lives through the memories of his life. He remembers his early days in the Doom Patrol, working with the Chief, Negative Man and Elastigirl. He recalls being trapped in his Robotman body. In his old body, he visits a psychiatrist believing his memories were dreams after his racing accident. Cliff is told he is lucky to be alive. Afterwards, Cliff hallucinates strange creatures and portals, before watching a naked woman at a window. Later at home, the TV starts talking to him and after several more hallucinations, Cliff wakes up in the real world as Robotman, greeted by Dorothy and Willoughby Kipling. Alarmed, Robotman tells his allies about what the Chief has done to Joshua, causing Kipling to pick up the Chief’s disembodied head from the ground. Then, Dorothy tells Robotman about how the Candlemaker has been released from her head and into the real world, ready to kill everyone. Kipling then explains that before his death, the Chief downloaded Robotman’s consciousness onto a computer. When Kipling and Dorothy located Robotman trying to make sense of his world without his brain (explaining the hallucinations), they put his brain onto a disc and inserted it in his body, giving him his consciousness back. Although angry about his brain, Robotman and the team travel to the Candlemaker, who has begun attacking New York…


After discovering that only they (and some lunatics) can see the Candlemaker’s devastation, Kipling tells Robotman that only he can defeat the villain. Robotman recalls that the Candlemaker’s body was made by the Chief and it had super-human abilities. Robotman is shocked when Jane appears, explaining what happened with her father at the farm (Doom Patrol (vol 2) 55-56) and that she no longer has any powers. After telling Robotman she has learned to live with her other selves, Kipling interrupts and makes the team aware of their mission. Then, by using a windup chattering skull, he guesses that the Candlemaker is on top of a skyscraper after a man falls to his death from it. Robotman decides to go up there alone, protecting Jane, Dorothy and Kipling. After some time, he locates the Candlemaker, who attacks Robotman, before he is stopped when Rebis appears. He unleashes his negative spirit and injures the Candlemaker. After the two become reacquainted, they attack the Candlemaker further, before he fights back and kills Rebis, turning him to a skeleton…


Dorothy recalls the first time she thought of the Candlemaker to Kipling. She explains that she was bullied by other children and one day, she wished one of them dead and created the Candlemaker, who carried out the deed. The more times she released him, the more powerful he grew. Kipling demands Dorothy tell him how to stop the (continued)

Dorothy recalling the aftermath of the Candlemaker's first murder. An excellent moment in the story that really makes you wonder who strong, and deadly, Dorothy can be. Pretty basic art by Richard Case and Stan Woch from Doom Patrol (vol 2) 60.

Candlemaker, causing Jane to argue with him. Suddenly, Robotman falls from the tall building and orders his friends to leave, telling them the Candlemaker killed Rebis. The Candlemaker then appears and attacks Kipling, burning his arm off. However, this doesn’t seem to affect him, and he leaves with Dorothy to Danny the Street. Although they escape, the street is gone when Robotman and Jane look for it, causing them to hide from the Candlemaker. He then finds Robotman and sends him flying, before creating a red vortex, which causes Jane to vanish, leaving Robotman alone with the Candlemaker. Meanwhile on Danny, Dorothy is clueless about what to do and Kipling collapses from the pain. At the same time, Robotman steals a car and finds Danny and they disappear. Later, Robotman and Dorothy visit Doc Magnus (Metal Men inventor) and asks him for his help, before the Candlemaker arrives and destroys Robotman’s legs…


While Magnus’s android Tungsten attacks the Candlemaker, Magnus and Dorothy escape, with Robotman crawling away. After destroying the android, the Candlemaker searches for Robotman and finds him with the others on Danny. The street reappears elsewhere and the Candlemaker begins destroying it. At the same time, Robotman explains that the Chief created the Candlemaker’s body with nanomachines and that Magnus may be the only one who could reprogram them. Magnus agrees to help. Meanwhile, the Candlemaker has finished destroying Danny, witnessed by Kipling. In the Doom Patrol base, the Candlemaker finds the heroes. Robotman tells Dorothy to run and warn Magnus to hurry. However, just when Magnus finishes his plan on the computer, the Candlemaker arrives. Dorothy then attempts to stop the Candlemaker by shooting it with a gun, which fails. Then, Robotman appears on the Chief’s wheelchair and attacks the Candlemaker with rockets, before activating Magnus’s plan. However, the Candlemaker fights it and threatens to kill Robotman. Suddenly, Kipling arrives with Rebis’s egg in a trolley (Doom Patrol (vol 2) 54), before Rebis himself appears and destroys the Candlemaker, allowing Dorothy to overcome its power. But Magnus discovers that the Chief had created thousands of other nanomachines and activated them before death, meaning they will continue to duplicate in order to generate a global disaster. Magnus then realises that the world will end in several hours…


Although they believe the world will actually end, Robotman claims that he could enter the machine and stop the nanomachines since his consciousness was held there in a disc. Reluctantly, Magnus agrees and Robotman’s body becomes inactive, as his mind enters the machine. Inside, Robotman finds the Chief’s head talking upon a welcome mat with a plant pot on his head. He demands that Robotman tells him the access code to proceed, otherwise he will be destroyed because of the nanomachines. Although scared, Robotman enters the nanomachines and somehow deactivates them, saving the world. Some time after at the mental hospital, Robotman finds the wall he once smashed with head (long ago in Doom Patrol (vol 2) 19, before saying that he feels free of rage and frustration. However, he is still worried about Jane, who has been missing for months and may even be dead, causing him to feel depressed. Later, Robotman is visited by Rebis, who takes him to Danny where the street has been recovered and returned to its former glory. Robotman is then shown a letter directed to him from Danny, telling him of a world long ago which was full of strange and wild adventures. However, it fell apart over time, with Danny being the only survivor of the world. Then, Robotman is shocked when the street begins to expand, with strange buildings and cities appearing, creating Danny the World. In the end, Rebis decides to travel across Danny, saying goodbye to Robotman, reassuring him that Jane is safe. Elsewhere, Dorothy finds a balloon with a smiley face, before grabbing onto it and flying high up in the sky.


MY THOUGHTS

Although there is just one last issue after this which concludes Morrison’s run, this story pretty much ties up most loose ends and works fantastically as a finale story for every character of the title, with the exception of Jane of course, who is featured in the next issue. Anyway, this story sort of continues where the last issue ended, with the Candlemaker revealing himself as the villain and ripping Robotman’s head off. After a somewhat slow start to the story, Robotman awakens in the real world with Dorothy and Kipling, witnessing the destruction of New York. While I’ll get to Robotman’s dream sequence later, this ending to the first part is excellent as it really sets the scene and presents to us how powerful the Candlemaker is. It also raises the question of how dangerous Dorothy can actually be, which Morrison had begun to touch on in earlier stories. A good majority of this story is either fighting the Candlemaker or running away from him. While I think that this plot can often be overlong or become tired, it works for a final story, particularly when it stars an apocalyptic villain. The threat of the candlemaker is genuine here and Morrison writes him as a compelling foe, mainly because he’s not real. During the story, he commits all sorts of hellish acts, such as seemingly killing Rebis and destroying Danny the Street. This makes the Candlemaker into a real threat and he certainly seems relentless when chasing Robotman and Dorothy. Speaking of which, the third part of the story begins excellently with the origin of the Candlemaker. It really adds another dimension to Dorothy’s character which is great, since I believe she hasn’t really been used as much in the run as other characters like Jane. That being said, it doesn’t give Kipling the excuse to pretty much bully her, but more on that later. The story begins to advance when Doc Magnus becomes involved and while I think his appearance is far too late in the story, especially as he is one of those that save the day, his presence does make sense, since he and the Chief both are scientists. We also see Magnus’s robot, Tungsten appear, but he gets killed and nobody likes the Metal Men. Anyway, Rebis then appears with his giant egg (Doom Patrol (vol 2) 54), which nicely ties up his story on the moon and defeats the Candlemaker. I think its great that Dorothy gets to be the one to defeat the Candlemaker, which makes sense as it has been haunting her and it completes a chapter of her life. The same applies to Jane, who is now powerless after confronting the traumatic memories of her abusive father. Afterwards, half of the last part is taken up with Robotman inside the Chief’s nanomachines, saving the world, which sounds like a pretty plain idea until you witness the aftermath. We see how far Robotman has come since Doom Patrol (vol 2) 19, yet he’s unsure if saving the world was the right thing to do. Aspects like this make these characters feel so real, even if Robotman no longer has any human organs inside of him. The ending of the story is perfect, with the heroes all going their separate ways, which really ties up the run in a nice bow and kind of makes you wish it just ended there, but of course it didn’t.


As I mentioned earlier, I’m not really a huge fan with how this story begins. I get that Morrison wanted to go with Robotman attempting to remember his life without a (continued)

Cliff Steele's inner-thoughts of his brain inside the metallic body of Robotman, working with the original Doom Patrol. Not my favourite moment of the story, but it features classic and very silver age art by Sean Phillips, from Doom Patrol (vol 2) 58.

brain, but if that’s the case, then surely his vison would just be nothing. Plus, that first segment can feel quite slow and after the epic ending of the last story, you just want to get on with it. A major problem I have with this issue is Willoughby Kipling, a character who I have never ever liked. Just imagine John Constantine, but without the charm and likability. This leaves with Kipling, who seems to just be an ar” ehole to anybody who speaks to him. Yeah, Morrison tries to add an interesting element to him by allowing one of his arms to be burnt off, but it doesn’t change anything. It just makes his creation more mysterious, but not in a compelling way, just in an irritating way. I really don’t know why he had to be in the story, since he doesn’t add anything apart from some pointless dialogue which doesn’t help anybody. Apart from that, I do think that Magnus was introduced a bit too late into the story and the revelation that the Chief’s nanomachines will destroy the earth comes far too late. This should have been introduced earlier, as it seems Morrison rushed the beginning of the last part, even if seeing the Chief’s head on a carpet is a funny sight.


Sean Phillips may not be the greatest artist, but both his layouts and finishes somewhat remind me the silver age. I’m not sure why, but I just get that impression. He may not be the best, but he is certainly more exciting and dynamic than Richard Case and Stan Woch, both of whom don’t give this story enough tension or emotion, which is certainly deserves. I’m just glad we won’t be seeing more of this duo for now…


Story: 8/10

Art: 6.5/10


The Empire of Chairs --- Written by Grant Morrison with art by Richard Case


THE STORY

After being found by the police, Jane is taken to a mental hospital after attacking a police officer. They have no records of who she is or where she came from. After six months, a psychiatrist named Marcia works out her troubled past, but other doctors ignore it. Meanwhile in her head, Jane remembers her friends, Robotman and Rebis. Later, Marcia speaks to Jane about the Doom Patrol, but she just explains she shouldn’t be there since the Candlemaker sent her. Although Jane knows what she is

Doom Patrol (vol 2) 63, the final issue of Grant Morrison's run on the title. A pretty standard cover by Case (which isn't a surprise), featuring Crazy Jane.

talking about is real, Marcia is unconvinced and suggests Jane undergo electro-convulsive therapy. Some time later, during a dream Jane experiences with the Doom Patrol, the doctors decide to give her a muscle relaxant, causing her dream to become even stranger, with the death of Robotman and Rebis. Marcia questions the doctor’s choice of medication, but she is ignored once again. Later, Jane is released from hospital and after just one day of being in the real world, she gives up and leaves her apartment. Some time later during a rainstorm, Jane is on a bridge when Robotman arrives, shocking her. He tells her to come out of the rain, before they leave and head home to Danny the Street.


MY THOUGHTS

Suitably for the last issue, Morrison wanted to focus on a character which debuted in his first issue, Crazy Jane. Throughout the run, I think that Jane has certainly been an excellent character. Whether it be her friendship with Cliff or the countless number of personalities she had, Morrison really did make her into a realistic three-dimensional character with feelings. I think the story actually ties up Morrison’s run pretty well here. For instance, when we first see Jane in Doom Patrol (vol 1) 19, she is in a mental hospital and here in Doom Patrol (vol 2) 63, it’s the same, except a lot has changed obviously. The best aspect of this story to me is Jane attempting to live an ordinary life. I really like this idea because after all the Doom Patrol adventures, she just can’t do it. Also, because of the denial of the real world in these characters, the idea is very suitable for a final issue, even if Morrison’s successor, Rachel Pollack, doesn’t turn the run back into something that Paul Kupperberg would write.

The problem I have with this story is that it lacks any aftermath effects and it is incredibly cryptic. When Jane leaves the hospital after what is depicted as quite a traumatic moment for her, she just seems to be alright afterwards and gets on with life. To me, this could have led to something far more interesting, but it doesn’t. Yeah, I get this is Morrison’s last issue so it would have been difficult, but I think there was massive potential there. Also, the cryptic-ness of the story makes it incredibly hard to deduce what is real and what isn’t. For example, it seems clear that Jane’s adventures with the Doom Patrol are in her head when she is in hospital, but is the ending real? In Pollack’s run, Robotman seems to be quite sad when thinking of Jane and I get that Morrison wanted a rather open-ended finale for Jane, but it can become slightly annoying when it becomes hard to separate real events and false events. Like I have mentioned before, I do like character pieces, but this one isn’t Morrison’s best.


Well, this is it. Farewell Richard Case, at least for a while. Despite your own inks on this story, it’s still sleep-inducing and dull. Nothing else to say really. While I may feel no emotion when looking at his art, compared to those who take over as artist on the title afterwards, like Ted McKeever, Case was an artistic genius…


Story: 6.5/10

Art: 6/10


Judgement Day --- Written by Grant Morrison with art by Steve Pugh, Ian Montgomery, Brad Vancata, Richard Case, Walt Simonson, Paris Cullins, Ray Kryssing, Duke Mighten, Mark McKenna and Ken Steacy


THE STORY

The Doom Force charge towards their enemies. Its members include: Spinner, who can reach into the minds of robots, The Crying Boy, who is cursed with bad luck, The Scratch, an unknown hero, Shasta, The Living Mountain, who can demolish anything

Doom Force Special, featuring an excellent cover by Keith Giffen and Mike Mignola, which really makes fun of the art of Rob Liefeld and the X-Force. Also, looking at the cover, I do wonder which of the heroes will actually die? It couldn't be the one with the giant arrow pointing at him, could it?

with his strength and Flux, a shape-shifter. After obliterating their metallic enemies, they meet with Niles Caulder, the Chief, who once was the leader of the Doom Patrol, before the Doom Force. He explains that he set the robots on them as a test, causing the team to rage. However, the Chief explains that a new challenge has arisen in the shape of Anton Zero, a regular villain of the team. The Chief shows them that the villain has created a giant structure in the Nevada desert three days ago and has attacked the US Army. Therefore, the Chief orders his team to go out there and defeat Zero. Meanwhile, Zero and his sister, Una effectively gloat over their control over the city. Zero then shouts at his sister, ordering her to leave and wear something more revealing. Then, Zero’s robotic flying evil slave informs him of the Doom Force. This causes his master to send him out to find the heroes and destroy them. While the Doom Force and the remaining soldiers watch Zero’s base, the villain’s minions appear and attack the heroes. Using their mighty strength, the Doom Force brutally attack the androids, detaching their heads and causing their bodies to combust. Hell yeah. Look at those muscles! Anyway, then, Una appears wearing effectively nothing and almost kills Flux, who quickly launches the villain’s gun out of her grasp. However, Flux and the Crying Boy are captured and sent to Zero, who says (I’ll condense it down a bit) he is the cure to society, and he will destroy all human life. He then confirms his first target is Los Angles, causing the Crying Boy to sob once again since it’s his hometown. Suddenly, Zero’s base rises from the ground, appearing as a giant stone body. Meanwhile, the other Doom Force members continue to fight Zero’s minions. At the same time, thanks to the Living Mountain, he enlarges himself to fight Zero’s base. After defeating the minions, the Doom Force confront Zero and his sister, who is then sent a telegram telling them that their bid for a house has failed, since somebody else had a higher bid. In anger, he destroys his base, before he and his sister escape in a plane half naked. However, the Living Mountain comes in and enlarges himself. The plane crashes into the mountain, seemingly killing himself, Zero and Una. In the end, although the team mourns the loss of Shasta, they walk away from the desert laughing.


MY THOUGHTS

I despise everything about these kinds of comics. Gone of the days of good characters with engaging dialogue. Gone of the days when a writer’s aim was to create a creative, yet concrete story to facilitate said characters. Gone of the days when artists had the task of facilitating the story with visual emotion and tension. In its place stands regular angry flat characters with muscles the size of rocket launchers and t*ts the size of basketballs. Emotion is replaced by overlong fight scenes full of explosions and combusting heads and a story is simply there just to allow characters to fire their gigantic guns at shiny robotic foes. Because of this crap, I love this issue. It’s clear to anybody that Doom Force, Zero and the art is very much based on the “works” of Rob Liefeld, particularly X-Force, which most people who love classic comics absolutely despise and here, I would hate it. However, Morrison writes this story pointing and laughing at those stories and its art and there is nothing in this story which Morrison takes seriously. Because of that, I think this story is brilliant. There is so much fun to be had just laughing at the main characters, their ridiculous powers and certainly their costumes. For example, the Living Mountain character is a pretty lame concept. No, I’ll just be explicit. Its sh*t. You can’t take it seriously, yet “creators” like Liefeld would happily write a character like that, believing it be up there with the works of Alan Moore. Morrison gets this right. This isn’t a serious story, its as basic as you can get really. Superheroes stop bad guys. That’s it and it really shows how the Marvel creators like Liefeld and McFarlane (who later form Image Comics, more of the same shit) were incredibly lazy with their stories, caring more about big guns and big muscles. In terms of costumes, Una’s “costume” reeks of Liefeld, as she is near-stark naked. In fact, characters are either near-naked or wearing incredibly tight clothing, meaning that they might as be naked anyway. Some of the other heroes, such as the Crying Boy are incredibly stupid ideas that would fit right at home in the X-Force and I repeat, Morrison does it incredibly well here. As opposed to those comics, he doesn’t take it seriously. I think Morrison must have been laughing when writing this special, mainly because it is laughing at the trash that people like Liefeld come up with and gladly call art, before selling it for an unthinkable amount of money. Sorry for that rant, but that’s the truth of Liefeld and McFarlane. They both write or draw pretty crude bodybuilder borderline-pornographic art and sell it. Overall, I do think this story is excellent. You couldn’t do this too often because it would become stale and irritating, but Morrison highlights the flaws of comics at the time, both in how creators would write and draw comics and to be honest, some of those problems still linger…


Despite the large number of artists, they all do a perfect job of replicating the horrible art of Rob Liefeld. Whether it be the extraordinary anatomy of the “characters”, the (continued)

The Doom Force ready for action, featuring the 'heroic powers' of the Crying Boy, Flux, The Living Mountain, The Scratch and Spinner, all of whom reek of the 1990s. An fantastic double-page spread by Ian Montgomery and Brad Vancata. who really capture the awfulness of Liefeld's art. In regular circumstances, I would despise this art, but here as a parody, it is brilliant satire.

over-excessive use of flicky little lines or the sheer amount of splash pages, the art reflects the negative side of comics at the time and as a parody, its great. Let me make myself clear. I hate this art style. I think its against the very foundations and aims of comic book storytelling. However, this is a parody, made intentionally to poke fun at the X-Force and because of that, the art works incredibly well and really adds to the intentionally written steaming pile of sh*t that some fools may call a story.


Story: 10/10

Art: 10/10


VERDICT

Overall, Doom Patrol: Planet Love finishes Morrison’s long stint on the title very well. The penultimate story featuring the Candlemaker is great, giving these beloved characters the farewells, they deserve, while they get the sh*t beaten out of them by the Candlemaker. The final story featuring Jane may not be perfect, but it also finishes the run nicely. Lastly, although not part of the mainstream title, the Doom Force Special is excellent, depicting everything that was wrong with comics at the time and just making fun of it. But as a whole, Grant Morrison’s run on Doom Patrol is good, particularly at the beginning and end. While it does feature some unique plot with new characters, it alters older heroes similarly to how Alan Moore did on Swamp Thing (vol 2). However, the title does hit some rough patches in the middle, some of which can be unreadable. The art was never great¸ with Case conveying this unique world in a rather uninspired way. That being said, they could have done a hell of a lot worse. The run may not be as good as Animal Man (vol 1), but is still is very good and recommendable, particularly if you like the stranger side of comics…


Stories: 8/10

Art: 7.5/10


Next Week: Batman: Ten Nights of the Beast (Batman (vol 1) 417-420). Written by Jim Starlin with art by Jim Aparo and Mike DeCarlo. Expected to be published by 29/03/2020.

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